I’m often asked how I became a Sex & Intimacy Coach. Like any good story it’s not short nor straight forward.
While there are many factors, the biggest reason I am here today are two failed marriages before I was even 40. The details of those marriages will remain private, however both broke down due to intimacy issues on one level or another.
Like many girls from the midwest I grew up with teen parents. Because my parents were teenagers when they had my older brother and me they had a very matter-of-fact approach to sexuality. One that was both natural and realistic. I mention this as I deeply feel it’s one of the reasons I grew up without much sex shame.
Yes of course I had embarrassing moments like any other teen girl blossoming, but I never felt bad about feeling sexually awake.
I’ve always been a highly sexual person and I didn’t understand my sexuality at all. I was curious though. I liked reading books, doing workshops and anything that allowed me to talk about sex.
I rolled through high school and university easily, along the way becoming a yoga teacher and studying anything related to alternative health and well-being, picking up stacks of certifications in one thing or another too. All the time I was trying to figure out a path to working in the sexuality realm whilst on a personal level having mostly empty sexual experiences/encounters.
For years I had been called to work with sexuality and relationships, but I also had an excuse or block (having children etc). After leaving my last marriage this work basically threw itself into my lap and said ‘Now is the time.’
Anyone that knows me would wonder how someone like me, aka sexually vibrant person could end up not only in one, but two marriages that struggled intimately.
I’ve really been able to own the parts of me that enabled those situations. Through my deep yoga and embodiment practices and erotic studies I’ve finally come to a place of truly understanding my sexuality. I finally understand my pathways to pleasure, how to ask for what I want and hold firm boundaries where before they were loosely held.
I’m more empowered and confident than I’ve ever been. My sexual energy is being channeled creatively and abundantly. I’m in a real place of havingness, which I wholelly attribute to reclaiming, owning and understanding my sexuality and eroticism.
I’ve been around the block enough times that I can genuinely sit with you wherever you are on your intimate journey and provide the care, safety and skillfulness to help you navigate your path.